Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
