3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
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Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
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All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick