OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
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Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
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It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.