That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
