I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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