You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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