If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
