is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize