Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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