So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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