I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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