Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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