the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize