12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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