the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
What drink are we having for lunch?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize