Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
