I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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