Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
