My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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