I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
