it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
