Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
