your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
my sisters under your porch take her home
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize