Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize