i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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