Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
