the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Randomize
