her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I understand Curling. That high.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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