we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
It's never too late to be topless.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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