My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
