wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
