I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
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