And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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