Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions