Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
