I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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