; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
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Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
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I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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