so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
