So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you will always have a special place in my vag
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
