i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
