Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
