So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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