Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
