Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
