They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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