She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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