Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize
