I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
