All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize