She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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