I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Drunk is not a location!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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