We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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